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Thread: The MAN THREAD!!!

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  1. Default  
    #21
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Ravens Grin Inn, 411 carroll st.mount carroll ill.
    Posts
    12,809
    2am to 6:30am-asleep, dreaming of living in a Hillbilly trailer Court, having fun making gasoline-powered little cars for propelling live roosts over to henville. The hens see him rocketing toward them, rooster hits chests at a glancing angle and falls from gasoline powered rocket car.
    Hens all cackle.
    6:31am YYIIII! Something jumped on my pleasured parts!
    The CAT...again!! (Make note to remedy this old situation)
    6:35 to 7:00 take the dog for his "business" walk to, wherelse? It is called the city burning ground (down around the corner)
    7:00 Massaged right wrist to attempt to make it feel normal again since the dog was pulling my arm off for the entire walk. Someday maybe I will get brave enough to taste some of the mouseheads coming out of the winter's snow and he will have to worry about holding me back on the leash?
    7:15 Turn on the computer for Mr. Tuxedo
    7:16 Closing the bathroom door behind me.
    7:45 Opening bathroom door.
    7:46 I notice Mr. Tuxedo has responded to several hauntworld posts.
    7:55 I check the mailbox, no mail yet.
    8:00 I pick up the cigerette butts in the parking lot.
    8:30 mail comes early! Lots of checks
    8:40 Polish my chromed wheelbarrow
    9:20 Finally get done polishing the chromed wheelbarrow, time to take that money to the bank.
    9:30 I accidently scrape the sides of the bank's door frame again, I just hate this, since next year I will probably be the owner of this dump!
    9:40 I return home to find the FBI surrounding the house.
    9:43 Mr. Tuxedo throws a note from the upstairs window, saying he won't be coming out. It seems Mr. Tuxedo is guilty of using my computer for "Kitty " Porn!
    He claims temporary insanity, being made nutty from the fumes I had made while in the bathroom, next to the computer room.

    Three Months Later....Mr. Tuxedo is a free cat! Acquitted!
    I am sentenced to now wear an air-tight Depends!
    I guess I'm going to be going hot-air bal-loonin (The Hindenburg was small-potatoes compared the potential gas explosion welling up inside those diapers!)
     

  2. Default reply 
    #22
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Posts
    493
    Not sure if this qualifys again but last night got sick of my daughters boyfreind pushing my daughter around so i went over to their place, found a very intoxicted boyfreind in my face so i beat the crap out of him! Seriously! Bad night!

    Went down to the station to at least file a report with a very rude non believing cop and as we were filling out the report the boyfreind intoxicated drives himself to the station and thinks i don't see him walk in.

    He takes a swing at me, i duck, turn and nailed him again right in front of the cop! Needless to say he went to jail for assault and battery and a DUI, long night im going to work in a coma today!
    Manlaw You can beat another guys a$$ if they ever even think about hitting your kid and get away with it!
     

  3. Default  
    #23
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Ravens Grin Inn, 411 carroll st.mount carroll ill.
    Posts
    12,809
    ..and he never saw you coming because you used your haunted skills to disguise yourself as a lollipop!
    (The ultimate "Sucker-Punch!")
    "Go ahead, Big Boy, take off my wrapper, take a few licks.." WHAP!!

    Seriously, not everyone is a nice person, add alcohol= "Instant Azhol!"
    With millions of people alive on this planet, why do smart people put dangerous losers into their personal lives?
    Of course I am looking at life through the "lenses" of many such mistakes that I have made in my almost 58 years of living.
    "Older"= "Smarter?" I do hope so.
     

  4. Default Re: reply 
    #24
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Longview, Texas
    Posts
    1,351
    Quote Originally Posted by Kevin Dells
    Not sure if this qualifys again but last night got sick of my daughters boyfreind pushing my daughter around so i went over to their place, found a very intoxicted boyfreind in my face so i beat the crap out of him! Seriously! Bad night!

    Went down to the station to at least file a report with a very rude non believing cop and as we were filling out the report the boyfreind intoxicated drives himself to the station and thinks i don't see him walk in.

    He takes a swing at me, i duck, turn and nailed him again right in front of the cop! Needless to say he went to jail for assault and battery and a DUI, long night im going to work in a coma today!
    Manlaw You can beat another guys a$$ if they ever even think about hitting your kid and get away with it!
    Now that's a good manlaw. More power to you on that one.
    Brad Bowen
    Owner/Operator of the Ultimate Fear Haunted House in Shreveport, LA
    www.ultimatefear.net
     

  5. Default  
    #25
    Raycliff Manor Guest
    I'll pitch in on this topic as soon as The Golden Girls episode ends! :lol:

    Kel
     

  6. Default  
    #26
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Manitowoc Wisconsin www.nightmarefactoryhaunt.com
    Posts
    2,055
    Kevin, I totally appreciate where you are coming from. My little sweetie is 8 years old, and I swear to God, if any guy treats her wrong, they will have a VERY bad day.
    www.atheateroflostsouls.com Or if you need makeup or supplies www.abramagic.com


    "I am a frickin evil genius who deserves some frickin respect!"
     

  7. Default  
    #27
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    671
    Since you claim 20,
    This guy knocked down 97 Krystals (Southern White Castles) in 8 mins.

    Info:http://www.krystalsquareoff.com/headlines.php?s=58
    Side note: Second Place was 91

    The event was LIVE on ESPN2.
    I was turning green about 2 mins into watching it.
    http://www.myspace.com/joedog158
    Personal MySpace


    My Mottos:
    When in doubt, get the hell out - Jason Hawes

    Of all the things I have taught you, remember this:
    If you see me running, KEEP UP! - Joe Dog
     

  8. Default reply 
    #28
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Posts
    493
    Brad and Ron,
    Thanks for the support guys, things have been quiet since then.

    Just wish she would move back home and finish her education already, why do young adults have to be soooo stubborn and think they are going to conquer the world when they see how hard their parents have struggled over the years!
     

  9. Default  
    #29
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Portland, OR
    Posts
    270
    Hey Kevin,

    With daughters 18 and 22 I can definitely empathize. All we can do is trust we have taught them well and back them up when necessary. As a dad and and ex-cop, I think you did what you needed to.

    As far as my "manly act" last week (being 43 years old and not in ideal shape mind you) I stepped into the octagon and competed in a full contact Mixed Martial Arts (MMA) competition for the first time. The kid that I was fighting was 22 years younger, 40 pounds heavier, and 5 inches taller than I was. No, I didn't make it past the first round, but I was beaten up in a manly way!

    Dave
    Lords of Chaos, LLC
    House of Chaos Haunted Attraction
     

  10. Default  
    #30
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    louisiana
    Posts
    363
    hahahha dave u rock
     

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